Auntie Betty & Uncle George
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| 1936 Betty TURNER & George RITCHIE |
Auntie Betty was Pop’s only sibling and, as my Mum was an only child, we were a very small family; hence my Aunt and Uncle were the only relatives that I knew. There were second cousins but I was not to know any of them for very many years.
Betty Kathleen TURNER was younger than Pop by about two years being born on 24th September 1916 in Whitstable, Kent. She was a lively and very energetic person and a fierce and loyal supporter of her brother during their school days. She and her brother were brought up in an Army environment, with several years spent in Egypt. She met George RITCHIE who was in the RAF and a friend of her brother. They married in Gillingham, Kent on 2nd April 1938 when she was 21. After a year and a half, the Second World War started and they were to spend the following five years separated.
George was born in Tendring, Essex on 14th February 1913. He was the oldest of four children having three sisters, Olive, Thelma and Violet. His father, also George, was born in Edinburgh and his mother, Olive Eliza Rosalie TAYLOR, was born in Medway, Kent. Although it is only hearsay, I believe that his father was not a very nice man; I can only say that Uncle George was one of the gentlest men I have ever had the pleasure to meet.
In 1946, George left the RAF and followed us to Leeds where he bought 51, Leysholme Crescent. George went to work at English Electric and was to remain with the company until his retirement.
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| 51, Leysholme Crescent |
Betty never went out to work, being seemingly content to look after the home for George. She was never blessed with children but was a great friend and support to my Mum, especially when Michael was born. The talk in the family concerning children was that George did not want any because his family suffered from congenital deafness. Whatever the truth of that, I believe that it was a great shame, as they would have made great parents. Betty was, in common with Mum, an accomplished dressmaker with a special propensity towards alterations; that and her garden took up a large proportion of her time.
My Gran, Elsie Ella TURNER (née WARD), went to live with Betty and George as she got older. Eventually this put a considerable strain on the family as poor Gran suffered more and more from dementia. She died in Leeds General Infirmary (LGI) on 25th March 1971.
Betty and George took simple holidays and Filey on the east coast of Yorkshire became a favourite place. They so enjoyed just walking and being in each other’s company. They were also very interested in birds and we took them a couple of times to Bempton Cliffs which is an RSPB sanctuary hosting a wide range of seabirds including Puffins and Gannets in large numbers. They also came and stayed with us when we lived in Lincoln and we enjoyed many happy days when the children were young out and about around Sherwood Forest. They also made the long trip to Cornwall once but it was a difficult time because Auntie Betty was in the early stages of dementia.
I believe that Betty would have liked to have moved back to Canterbury when George retired as she loved Kent so much but it was not to be as I believe that George did not want to move.
For some years they were regular supporters of Leeds United Football Club, attending all the home games, however, as time went by, they stopped going when the antics and language of the crowd became increasingly aggressive.
Every Christmas for many years, George would write a Christmas Message to those members of the family who were “far away”. When I got older and spent time away in the RAF, I was a recipient of these messages and they contained the most wonderful prose. He could really paint a picture in words. It is with regret that I have to say that I did not collect them. At the time collecting things like that seemed a lot of bother and as we moved around a lot, especially in Germany, there was a need to destroy anything considered not absolutely vital. I made a great mistake.
Uncle George was an interesting character about whom I will relate a couple of stories, not with any intention of being critical although one of them might appear to be so. Auntie Betty really wanted a Tumble Drier as she got older but George, who controlled the finances, said that they could not afford one. When Pop heard this, he promptly bought one for her because he felt that his sister deserved it. After both George and Betty died, the problem of emptying the house, prior to selling it, cropped up. Both our family and George’s joined together and set about the task. As may be imagined, after 50 years in the same house, there was plenty to sort, including an attic full. Nick was given the job of sorting out the attic because he was by far the youngest and fittest. After we had finished looking into every corner of the house, we discovered that we had over £3,000 in cash! Remember, George couldn’t afford a Tumble Drier. They probably did not know that all that money was in the house.
At the back of the house and just off the kitchen was an old lean-to Glass House. On top of, and underneath, the fitted benches were loads of boxes and in those boxes were years supplies of newspaper and cardboard, all neatly torn into the correct size to fit the boxes. This was obviously George saving everything that might ever be useful.
I really should mention that George played hockey for Adel Hockey Club for many years and was considered a very competent goalkeeper. When he stopped playing, he was presented with a memento for his efforts. This annoyed Pop, but not in a really bad way, because when he finished playing he got precisely nothing!
One of George’s other hobbies was stamp collecting; his extensive collection was taken mostly by his side of the family, which was absolutely right. Just one album came to me and, in the end, I gave it to charity because I really did not want to keep it.
Over the years, Betty and George had collected a Welsh Dresser full of Toby Jugs. These were split amongst lots of family members. It was sad to see these and other collections split up or given to charity; we can only hope that someone, somewhere benefited from their love of nice things.
They lived together at 51, Leysholme Crescent until Betty’s health deteriorated and she went into hospital around 1998; she was subsequently transferred to Hopton Court Care Home in Armley We visited her on a couple of occasions and Pop went quite a lot but the experience was painful as anyone who has a relative in care suffering from any form of dementia will know. Effectively visitors would sit and talk to themselves. George continued to live in his own house until he died there on 27th September 2000. Betty followed just two weeks later on 11th October .
Funeral services for both of them were held at Rawdon Crematorium and their ashes were taken, by Pam & Robert LUNNON, to Filey in East Yorkshire where they were scattered at ‘The Brigg’ on 13th November 2000. I have reproduced the address that I gave at Betty’s funeral service. The address given at George’s funeral was given by Canon Robert LUNNON who was the husband of his niece, Pam and I do not have access to that.
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| 1991 Betty & George RITCHIE at 51, Leysholme Crescent |
All of you here today will have your own memories of Betty, as a Sister, Aunt, Great-Aunt, Friend, Neighbour or Carer. My own memory is of two people, Betty and George, together for 60 years and living in their own home for more than 50.
Betty was brought up in an Armed Service atmosphere living with her parents and brother in various Army Camps, the most interesting being the time she spent in Egypt. It was really, therefore, no surprise that she fell in love with an R.A.F. man who was a friend of her brother. They married in 1938, when she was just 21.
She was a lovely homemaker and did everything possible to create a happy atmosphere both at home and with all the people she met.
Although she was a trained dressmaker, her real interest was the home and activities she engaged in. She started playing tennis at the age of 14 and played her last game at the age of 70.
Unfortunately she had no children but was a most wonderful Aunt to her brother's children and their offspring; the same with her husband's relations and their offspring. They all loved her.
I can only speak from my own personal experiences, but both my brother and I spent many happy hours in and around Number 51 and both sets of our children were always made most welcome.
Part of her home making activities included hours spent in the garden and walking many miles. Her favourite walks were at Filey where she spent many happy days every year.
Her interest in the R.A.F. was almost an obsession and she spent a lot of time collecting articles, photographs etc. and carefully making up a collection which was both happy and sad. This is illustrated by two poems, reproduced on the next page, of which she was very fond.
The first (and happy) was called:
THE SALVAGE SONG (or: the housewife's dream)
My saucepans have all been surrendered
The teapot is gone from the hob
The colander's leaving the cabbage
For a very much different job.
So now, when I hear on the wireless
Of Hurricanes showing their mettle
I see, in a vision before me
A Dornier chased by my kettle.
And the sad? - Not really.
DO NOT STAND AT MY GRAVE
Do not stand at my grave and weep
I am not there, I do not sleep
I am a thousand winds that blow
I am the diamond glints on snow
I am the sunlight on ripened grain
I am the gentle autumn rain
When you awaken in the morning's hush
I am the swift uplifting rush
Of quiet birds in circled flight
I am the soft stars that shine at night.
Do not stand at my grave and cry
I am not there, I did not die.
A fitting epitaph to a gentle lady.
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